Earth-Man demands a new ring, Phantom Girl makes fun of her best friend, and Lightning Lad dies... again... let's look at Legion of Super-Heroes (Volume 6) #6 & Adventure Comics #520

Legion of Super-Heroes (Volume 6) #6

This cover just fills me with dread, but I think it's supposed to...

The only recap we need is this: Phantom Girl phased into Shadow Lass' room without knocking and discovered her in bed with Earth-Man. Yep, that's the sound of every reader collectively gagging at the thought of the xenophobic villain in a romantic relationship with everyone's favorite Talokian.

Paul Levitz wrote it. Francis Portela drew it.

We begin in the Himalayas, where Colossal Boy, Shadow Lass, and Phantom Girl are flying through the mountains and searching for Titanian runaway refugees. They're following a ship that looks remarkably like an Airspeeder from The Empire Strikes Back.

Phantom Girl jokes that Gim should have learned about this while having Sunday dinner with his mom, who's back in Earthgov. Gim points out that since he's Jewish, it's Friday dinner, and Tasmia rips into Tinya for entering her room without knocking... which, you know, is a fair point.

They burst into the Airspeeder, which the Titanians have stolen to find their ancestors' graves. But since their destination, the Tibetan Plateau, has been closed for generations, Tinya takes control of the ship and turns them around.

Back at Legion HQ, Marte Allon defends getting the Legion to catch the Airspeeder thieves and makes sure Gim is coming over for dinner tonight with his wife, Yera.

Tinya remembers to knock on Tasmia's door this time, and the longtime friends reconcile. Tinya still can't believe Tasmia's with Earth-Man, but they're still best friends. We get a very cringy "Kirt's strong -- a warrior --" while Tasmia strikes a very weird pose. You know, this would've made more sense during the Threeboot, when Shadow Lass was dating anyone who could fight. This version, however...

Next, we're back at the Painted Desert Refugee Camp, where Brainiac 5, Earth-Man, and Timber Wolf are overseeing 1,900 Titanians getting shipped to new camps on Ventura (thanks to Dream Girl) and Colu (thanks to Brainy, himself). While Querl's lost in thought, Timber Wolf yells out that there is an incoming ship.

Kirt "borrows" Brin's powers and rips through the ship like paper. Brainy comments that he's not sure if Kirt is an enthusiastic convert or if this change in behavior is a result of the morality reinforcement feature he built into the Flight Ring.

The pilot of the attacking ship, who somehow survives the explosions and destruction, tells Earth-Man that he did this for him. Kirt tells him that he was wrong. And that this is all a waste. They're really pushing this face turn hard.

Ultra Boy is on monitor duty and Tinya joins him. Jo wonders what Tasmia said when Tinya asked about Earth-Man and Phantom Girl mocks her friend, striking the same pose and quoting the "warrior" line mentioned above.

As the longtime couple start kissing, Shrinking Violet and Lightning Lass arrive, wanting to be logged out as they're headed off on a vacation to Imsk together. Salu requests the pair keep an eye on Earth-Man while they're gone.

And yes, that is Salu's hand on Ayla's hip, so we're making their relationship official. Not dramatically obvious, because I'm not sure where DC was in 2010, open-mindedness-wise, but it's better than what we got in the past.

At dinner at the Allon's, Yera's shocked that the U.P. have pardoned Earth-Man and wonders if they've gone mad. We get the political reasons and Marte mentions that some planets think that everyone on Earth needs to beg for a pardon. No Mr. Allon for this dinner (it's just the three of them), which tells me that either I've completely forgotten a plot point here or this is Levitz revealing something new with Marte saying, "Life goes on, children... life goes on."

Brainiac 5 is back in his lab, still researching how to get rid of cockroaches, when Earth-Man enters and lets him know he's been pardoned. Then he tells Brainy that he needs a new Flight Ring, one without all the "enhancements" the original had. Kirt's staying on the team and he's convinced that Earthlings need to get along with offworlders - but he doesn't have to like any of them. Especially Brainy.

I think I've given up trying to understand how Earth-Man can do, or can know, everything they reveal in these books. His powers are, essentially, able to do anything that Levitz needs. So how could he know the ring was controlling his personality? No idea.

I just wish there was something, anything, in these past six issues to show why he's changed his tune. He just has. No reason. No rhyme. It's just because that's what they wanted to happen. I think this is the inherent fatal flaw in all of this - there's no reason for Earth-Man to reconsider his position and become a hero.

 

But, much to my excitement, we get a second story. And this one is written by Levitz, pencilled by Phil Jimenez and inked by Scott Koblish. I love Jimenez's work and, not going to lie here, if he was the regular Legion penciller, I'd be very, very, very happy.

Cosmic Boy is flying out to Montauk Point, the site of the Legion Academy. I suppose I shouldn't be surprised that we're getting more Legion Academy tales - I know Levitz loves them.

Rokk flies out and, instead of being excited at the prospect of new Legionnaires, his thoughts are dark. He's not happy and thinks, "I get to choose which kids to send to die. Mom, are you ever going to forgive me for letting Pol become a Legionnaire too... and dying in my place?" Geez... I know that leadership is a heavy burden, and we've see Legionnaires worried about young people joining the team, but this seems especially harsh.

Duplicate Girl greets them and is excited to show off the newest class. She's identified as Luornu Durgo... not Taine? Did I miss something else? Did Chuck finally realize that his wife has been in love with two other Legionnaires for the entire time they've been married?

Anyway, the new Academy class is:

• Comet Queen, who can fly in space and gave Cosmic Boy a huge when he arrived, showing that those Sub stories from Volume 3 haven't been wiped away
• Gravity Kid, who can change his gravity or the gravity around him
• Chemical Kid, a different person from Phlon who can catalyze chemical reactions just like poor Condo
• Variable Lad, whose powers change every time he uses them
• Dragonwing, an Earthling who has fire breath and acid venom

There's an emergency nearby, so Cosmic Boy leads the kids into action. Duplicate Girl is happy to join, commenting that she knew she'd have more fun than Chuck would at his reunion.

Okay, so forget everything I wrote before about their relationship... I still think he should've dumped her for a variety of offenses in this continuity.

There's a huge forest fire and Rokk wants the kids to share their ideas. Comet Queen rushes in without thinking, of course. Gravity Kid tries to create a firebreak by making everything around him heavy but it's too slow of a solution.

Dragonwing wants to speed up the fire and Gravity Kid accidentally uses his power on her. To no surprise, she's not happy with that.

Then, suddenly, we leave the action to go back to the Academy. Sensor Girl is narrating, talking about how the universe requires a new champion. She's waiting for someone to be reborn, someone to come to her. It can't be Val, again, but it will be a new Karate Kid.

We see someone in a costume similar to what Karate Kid used to wear and Projectra says that this new hero may be from a different dimension or may be from her dreams. Then we see her, lying in bed with the bloodied costume of her former husband.

Okay, that's a little creepy. But does this mean we have a new Karate Kid? Is this how Val came back to life before? I have so many questions. Why if Karate Kid the champion? Does this mean Myg was the other champion? Is the champion always a martial artist? Does any of this make sense? Are we sure Projectra hasn't gone insane?

Back to the fire, Variable Lad becomes super smart and tells Chemical Kid to use his powers to slow down the fire. Which he does. Fire's out and, instead of celebrating the win, Duplicate Girl says that they're not ready to be Legionnaires yet. They just need more time.

Cosmic Boy hopes he can keep the team together until then... wow... just staying dark and depressed, isn't he?

Back at Legion HQ, we learn that Mon-El and Polar Boy are staying on Daxam and Saturn Girl and Lightning Lad are taking a break to spend more time with their sons. They know Cosmic Boy will keep the team together.

He's not so sure, and when Timber Wolf arrives to let him know the S.P.s are there, Rokk activates the leadership election system.

Then he heads to the Legion Hall of Heroes, where GiGi Cusimano and Chief Zendak (who's a Durlan assassin now) want to talk about how they need the Legion's help - someone's trying to kill the United Planets council.

Why would you meet people in the room with statues of all the dead Legionnaires? Doesn't the Legion have a greeting room? Or a boardroom?

Also, and this is just me probably misremembering things again, but why is there a statue of Mentalla here? I know she died after pretending to join the Fatal Five, but is that enough to get a statue? She was never a Legionnaire. Of course, neither was Kid Psycho or Proty... 

 

All in all, this was a mixed bag of an issue.

I always like when the Legion slows down and we get to see them off duty. I'm glad to see some Legionnaires make appearances when we haven't seen them in a while, like Chameleon Girl (although I'm still waiting to see her lose it on Earth-Man for, you know, beating her half to death).

But there are just too many fatal flaws here. When we're already having longtime Legionnaires quit, take leaves of absence, or just disappear (don't think I haven't noticed that Wildfire's costume was destroyed many issues ago and he hasn't come back), it feels like a book where the writer is still trying to figure out his main cast. When you spend a bunch of pages on Legion Academy characters when none of them leap off the page and both Luornu and Rokk tell you they're not worthy of your time, it's tough to get excited.

I'll just revel in the Jimenez artwork and let's move on to the next book. 

 

Adventure Comics #520

I know I've ripped the cover art for this series before but wow... shouldn't basic anatomy be part of any comic artist's training?

This issue, titled "Tragedy: The Death of Lightning Lad" is brought to you by writer Paul Levitz, penciller Kevin Sharpe, and inker Mario Alquiza.

Just in case you weren't sure what was happening this issue, the first page shows everyone moving the coffin along and they actually identify Lightning Lad as being the body inside. I wish I was joking.

There was a part of me that hoped Levitz would try to make this is little suspenseful for readers who don't know this story. But nope.

Instead, he's flipping the story on its head by starting at the end and showing everything in flashback or recap. I'm actually a fan of this technique, especially when you're retelling something that everyone already knows has occurred. 

I'd also like to point out new Legionnaires Mon-El, Bouncing Boy, Star Boy, and Supergirl in the background. So the Legion is growing quickly. And are incredibly incompetent at catching Zaryan.

The story is told from Saturn Girl's point of view. She talks about Garth and reveals that he died trying to save her. And then she wonders, "...how many more people will I kill if this goes on?"

I really miss the Saturn Girl from the Silver Age - she was tough and was a great Legionnaire. The idea of her being such a mopey character isn't an improvement.

Garth's coffin is placed between two electro-towers to keep the body surrounded by the energies he controlled. Saturn Girl repeats her claim the she killed Garth and Cosmic Boy corrects her: Zaryan's freeze ray killed Lightning Lad.

Then we get a "Long Live the Legion!" and I just noticed Matter-Eater Lad is on the team as well.

Elsewhere in the universe, Lieutenant Zendak is about to lead a squadron of S.P.s to attack Zaryan's base when some of the Legion arrives. They take over and the S.P.s just let them. According to Zendak, "Between the Legion stopping the invasion and Brande buying off half the United Planets council -- the Legion gets first shot." You see, Zaryan tried to invade Earth and now everyone wants to stop him.

We get some of Levitz's new fondness for recaps given during fight scenes. Star Boy, Colossal Boy, Phantom Girl, and Sun Boy explain everything that's happened while they easily make their way through Zaryan's robot soldiers. Zaryan's technology has improved a lot. The first issue or two looked like they were very Silver Age era robots. Now, they look like they come from an Image comic.

We get a nice flashback to why Saturn Girl feels so guilty. Levitz ties back to Adventure Comics #304, as Imra explains how she had a plan to ensure she was the one who was going to die and, instead, watched Garth get blasted by the freeze ray.

She keeps criticizing herself for not being able to keep her oath to not let anyone die for her, for being too stupid to realize how Garth knew she was in danger, and for being a fool and not knowing she was in love with Lightning Lad until she watched him die. If only they had put something in the previous issues to show that she might make that discovery. Instead, she had a crush on Superboy and slept with Cosmic Boy.

Somewhere else in the galaxy, some of Zaryan's former soldiers let us know that the main villain died during the attack on Earth. They want to escape, but Ultra Boy, Superboy, and Supergirl start destroying their ships.

More recap back at Brainy's lab. As he send Mon-El back to the Phantom Zone, our favorite Daxamite lets us know that once he learned Saturn Girl was going to sacrifice herself, he had to tell someone.

More Saturn Girl reveals: they got a message capsule from Naltor, letting them know a Legionnaire was going to die. She planted the idea in every Legionnaire's head to elect her as new Legion leader. But while she was planning everything out, Mon-El, floating around the clubhouse like a ghost, discovered what she was going to do and told Garth.

Since he's a hero who wants to save everyone, Lightning Lad flew off and saved Saturn Girl's life.

We don't find out how Zaryan was defeated. Or why Invisible Kid is now Jacques Foccart. But, as Saturn Girl says, "...none of that mattered anymore."

Saturn Girl is ready to resign and wants to hand Cosmic Boy her costume. He refuses, telling her that she's still Legion leader and that they all make mistakes.

She heads back to Titan, meditates a lot, and decides that she's meant to be a Legionnaire. This is all part of her story. And she knows that if there's any way for the Legion to reverse the freeze ray and restore Garth, the Legion will find it.

Am I reading this right? If she's certain that they can reverse the freeze ray, then she must not believe Lightning Lad is dead. Does anyone else think that way? Or is that why they have him surrounded by lightning?

I'm honestly kinda glad this whole retelling of the Zaryan saga is over... it it, right? I haven't enjoyed the artwork, the stories have been average at best, and they've really turned Saturn Girl into someone I don't recognize at all. They've also made the Legion look pretty weak, too.

 

On to much happier things: The latest Long Live the Legion podcast has arrived and this episode we talk about one of my favorites: Chameleon Boy! Or just Chameleon, if you prefer.

If you'd rather watch it, check us out on YouTube!