Legion... It's the Legion... They're the modern reboot super-team... From the... town of Metropolis... they're about to face another scheme... We look at The Legion #9 & 10

First, let me thank everyone who came over to this blog site to see the new-look column and double thanks to everyone who left comments.

I've learned one very, very important thing: Reddit statistics are pretty much garbage.

But let's continue with this look at The Legion and see what they do after Ra's Al Ghul's desire for evolutionary change resulted in the Moon being in pieces, Legion World trapped in a geosynchronous orbit around the Earth, many, many dead people, and no more U.P. President.

The Legion #9

We begin with the Hanna-Barbera version of the Legion. Ultra Boy and Apparition are taking care of their new baby. Actually, Tinya's taking care of the baby and Jo wants to watch Magnoball.

Before anything gets to normal, the baby grows at an exceptional rate and suddenly becomes an adult with a beanie. Timber Wolf bursts into the house and he and Ultra Boy start fighting. Thankfully, this can't get any more surreal as...

Apparition wakes up from this nightmare... and the baby is now blasting rays from it's eyes and mouth and...

Apparition wakes up from this nightmare... to be comforted by Timber Wolf. They talk about how worried they are that the baby is growing too quickly and how they can't wait to get to Earth. Well, she can't wait. Not sure what Brin is thinking.

For those who are curious, Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning (DnA) are writing this tale of a lost Legionnaire and guest artist Stephen DeStefano is handling visuals. For those of you who don't know DeStefano's work, he's most famous for working in comedy or kids-friendly comics. You may know him from 'Mazing Man, some Walt Disney books, the Bill and Ted comic, or Billy Batson and the Magic of Shazam! Needless to say, he's a very specific choice for his cartooning skills.

Brin and Tinya are stuck on the Footstep Drive ship known as the Spirit of Metropolis, headed from Rimbor to Earth, and they've been struck by an energy wave and no longer have any power. Well that's not good. Luckily for them, they've only lost power to the engines, not power to anything else... That's not how power works, is it?

As Apparition walks to the doctor's office, she's hit with a blast of pain and a voice shouting "Pain-Hurt!" in her brain. And she finds out that all the Carggites aboard have been complaining about headaches and dizziness. Since we, the readers, already know that the Footstep drives are being operated by Carggites (among others) who had their genes played with, we already know what's coming. But Tinya doesn't, so when she gets hit by another blast, she goes immaterial and sinks down through the decks. 

She ends up in Main Engineering and the pain and voice continues. She's screaming for them to both stop.

Meanwhile, elsewhere on the ship, the baby has disappeared and Timber Wolf is on the trail. He's sniffing, tracking the scent, and rushing through the hallways. He discovers that the baby can phase just like his mom. He's also lost all sense of distance and slams his face into the wall. Isn't he supposed to be a superior athlete?

He follows the baby into the back, gets peed on (I think that's what's supposed to be dripping from the pipes) and then the baby takes off at super speed. Brin's left in a pile of sludge. Okay, so we have The Incredibles...

Back to Main Engineering - Tinya's back and investigating. For some unknown reason, she feels like she must get into the Inner Separation Chamber, a place where only McCauley Industry Specialists are allowed to go. And yes, we know what's coming next.

The baby is still falling through the ship, phasing and flying. He ends up in the bar and splashes into a drink just as Brin enters. Okay, I'm sure we can just accept that once Brin gets the scent of whatever he's tracking, he can find them anywhere. And he's super fast, so he can cross long distances in a single bound. He leaps at the drink, crashes into everyone, and rescues the baby.

Unfortunately, he spills the drink of a huge robot-like being. Well this isn't good.

Back to the engineering room, where Apparition decides to wait patiently to get into the chamber even though she could, you know, just phase inside. She gets blasted by another "Pain-Hurt!" and screams and cries that they have to open it up.

Back to the bar brawl that has broken out and Brin is trying his best to get the baby out of danger. To do that, he beats up the "robot" who started the fight, getting him to say "uncle." He grabs the baby, thinks everything is good, and then the baby fires eye blasts at the guy Brin just beat up.

And keeps firing. Everyone in the bar scatters and luckily no one is hurt. Brin starts scolding the baby once he stops firing and then the crying starts. After the crying comes the sneezing. The super sneezing. And the baby flies back and phases through the wall. Brin is not having a good day.

Back to engineering. In one of the most amazing coincidences, the baby phases into the chamber and the doorway opens. Tinya grabs her son just as Brin arrives.

Inside the chamber they see a mutated Vyrgan, split into three minds. They immediately put everything together, realizing that McCauley was experimenting on Vyrgans, Carggites, and Winathians (yep, one of the engineers is immediately able to identify everything that's going on just by looking).

They decide to put this poor being out of his misery, even though it means that they'll lose their way back to Earth. And as he dies, Tinya is hit with a wave of gratitude and release. But she also realizes what was the source of the energy wave - it was the power wake of Robotica! It's headed to Earth and there's no way they can warn them!

This was a really weird issue. Tonally, the harsh switch from broad comedy to deathly tragedy just didn't work. When you only have 22 pages to go from the Jetsons to letting a being die so they stop suffering, you really have to hit that mark well. This book didn't. I'll give them credit for trying, but it just didn't work for me.

I'm also not too sure if DnA have ever read an Apparition story before this. And I'm including the ones they wrote. Why was she so willing to just stand back and do nothing? Why was she such a weak character here? It just didn't make any sense. Also, and bear with me here - how could she possibly communicate with this alien being telepathically? It would make sense if, you know, any of the three alien races that made up the being came from a telepathic planet. Or if Tinya had shown any telepathic abilities before this. But just by saying "Well, they both are kinda Carggite, so that's why," is just irritating. Look, if you don't care to have any internal consistency, why should I care?

I did enjoy the Brin moments, even though they were overblown and really broad. I think he's a great character for comedy and that worked well here. And having him chase after the baby gave you everything you needed for the issue to work. Or, for those parts of the issue to work. Once again, I get the sense that DnA want to write Timber Wolf and are less interested in Apparition.

Artistically, it's a mixed bag. I think someone told him Brin was Wolverine, cause DeStephano draws him that way. And Apparition never has the same face twice... well, she does when they use the exact same panel twice. But, he was great at showing the alien diversity onboard the ship. Unfortunately, too many times the book was just too... cartoony. It just didn't work for me. All in all, this was a miss.

The Legion #10

Day One - drawn by Kev Walker

We begin as Shikari, Kid Quantum, Sensor, and Triad go through a threshold and arrive on Xanthu. The damage and destruction immediately hits Jazmin and she tears up.

They are greeted by XS, who sprints up and starts hugging Kid Quantum. It's the first time seeing her since she fell into the rift, so Jenni is ecstatic her friend is still alive.

Star Boy arrives and explains that Robotica is what destroyed the planet. The Legion is ready to take them back to Earth but Thom tells them they're got to stay and rescue whoever is still alive.

Which is when the Science Police arrive through another threshold, ready to help.

To Earth we go, where the planet is dealing with the devastation left after Ra's Al Ghul jump-started evolution. Winema Wazzo is sworn in as acting U.P. President and Jo's not happy. After all, she doesn't just hate him - she hates the Legion.

We have our first Legion meeting in the new Legion World and Cosmic Boy announces that the team has elected their new leader: Kid Quantum. Cosmic Boy recommended her to everyone, knowing that the team needs new blood running the team.

Saturn Girl and Spark aren't too pleased with the choice, figuring someone with more experience, like a founder, should be the team leader. They think it should've been Rokk, but he didn't want it.

Which is when Ayla announces that she's not Spark anymore, she's now Live Wire. Ok, so we now have two Legionnaires named after dead Legionnaires. That's not bad luck or anything.

A quick aside here - I kinda have to agree with both Saturn Girl and Live Wire here. Why pick Kid Quantum? What has she done at any point in the series, whether it was pre-the Blight, or Legion Lost, or even the first 8 issues of this series, to show that she should be leader of the team? I mean, I get that she's DnA's fave, but there has to be more than that, right? And I'm guessing this wasn't from a fan vote, was it? I'm all for elevating characters, but this is yet another moment of DnA shoving someone at the readers.

Elsewhere, Brainiac 5 and Shvaughn Erin are talking about how they can get needed information out of Ra's Al Ghul. Brainy delivers a ton of necessary exposition (glad he's so good at that):

• The Terrorforms are just hanging out in downtown Metropolis
• Over a fifth of the population are seed pods
• Kinetix is the answer to what's going on
• Robotica is 5 or 6 months away

They've built a threshold chamber in Legion World, where people can just find a Kwai, pick a portal, and head wherever they want. Umbra heads back to Mallor, wanting to get her powers back. She's, not surprisingly, irritable. Live Wire heads back to Winath to her family home.

Once home, she meets up with Mekt, takes his hand, and they head to the farm. They don't show her delivering the bad news which confuses me a little if this is going to be the impetus to turn Mekt bad again. But since this issue is, like a lot of these Legion issues, sprinting through stories, I can understand why.

Just in case all this recap and story development was getting boring, the Terrorforms have flown off into space, encircling the globe in a precise formation. Kid Quantum signals an alert because of this new development.

Day Two - drawn by Kalman Andrasofszky

Sharn Nux, a Coluan, arrives on Legion World and is greeted by Invisible Kid. She talks about how Brainy is an aberration - eighth-level intelligence is considered the optimum upper level on Colu.

We get a nice, somewhat awkward conversation between Ultra Boy and Saturn Girl where he tells her he's not in love with her and they've been avoiding each other because she thought he did. Still no apology for, you know, playing with his mind and treating him like a child... but this Saturn Girl is... not very nice, is she?

To the Legion World command deck, where Kid Quantum is talking with President Wazzo - the Robotican attack is 15 hours away, not 5 months, so it's the right time to panic. That also explains why the Terrorforms have taken a defensive position around the Earth. Sharn is also there, as she's a Robotican expert. She recommends an immediate attack - stop them before they get any closer. Winema agrees, putting the Legion in charge. What? Now she trusts them?

At the S.P. detention center, Venge has killed his way through the guards to get to what's left of Tharok (we all remember him from Legion Worlds, and having Robotican tech in his body). Venge presses a button on a control stick and Tharok's robotic body comes to life and starts growing.

Day Three - drawn by Olivier Coipel

Under Kid Quantum's command, the U.P. naval fleet (and I'm not going to try to wrap my head around the fact that they're referring to a space fleet as the navy, when they're not on water) heads through a threshold to attack the Roboticans. She leaves Legion World under Triad's command and leads a squad of Legionnaires to join the fight.

Brainiac 5 calls Legion World to let them know that Tharok has escaped and is taking over the facility, infecting it with his robotics. He's connected to the Earth-link system and he suggests they warn the fleet.

At the interception point, they're scanning for any signs of life on the Robotican craft but getting nothing. They prepare to fire and then the Robotican ship (at least I think it's a craft - they don't show anything on the page) disappears.

Where'd it go? No idea - but Earth's turned into a machine and they need help right away.

Day One I liked. Kev Walker did a nice job on pencils and this really felt like a nice "calm before the storm" moment for the Legion. They basically set up everything for the next story line and let us get more familiar with some of the characters. I kinda wish this had been the whole issue, actually.

Day Two I liked less. Andrasofszky couldn't draw any character the same way twice - his Kid Quantum was especially bad. Story-wise, we have yet another moment of things happening that make no sense if you think about it for a second.

Venge breaks in, kills a bunch of people, re-activates Tharok, and no one notices until the next day? How? What? And also, Venge is, I'm assuming, working with Robotica - so this means that Ra's Al Ghul was working with someone who would eventually betray him? Does this make Ra's look dumber? Has Venge become the big villain now?

I'm glad the Ultra Boy/Saturn Girl story is done, but disappointed that she's, once again, going to walk away from any consequences. At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if she was revealed as the master villain, mentally controlling as many Legionnaires as possible.

Day Three looked great - I loved the designs of the fleet and the moment between Brainiac 5 and Sharn Nux. But, once again, we have artwork that doesn't actually show what it's supposed to show. Was it so hard to actually draw the Robotican craft? Or homeworld? Or whatever it's supposed to be?

I'm going to make this comment, and I know I'll be making this multiple times during the rest of this series - we have now entered "The Authority" Legion, where every story line involves the Earth being almost obliterated. We'll talk more about why this doesn't work and why this is just so... tiring... as a story device in future columns.

Our next Legionnaire in the spotlight... Tellus!!

We've reached the last of the new Legion members who joined before the Crisis on Infinite Earths and the last considered the "Bronze Age" Legionnaires. Much like Quislet, Tellus was unique to the Legion for a number of reasons:

• He was the second Legionnaire to replace a past member while possessing the same power-set - with Saturn Girl having quit the Legion, they needed a telepath and telekinetic.

• He was also a non-humanoid Legionnaire who more closely resembled a fish, which makes sense considering he comes from a water planet - Hykraius.

• He was the first Legionnaire who couldn't actually live on Earth without help breathing. He needed to wear a special mask that allowed him to breathe methane instead of oxygen. Thankfully, Brainiac 5 built him one - although it is a shame that no other scientist on Earth could have accomplished that.
  

• Personality-wise, he was a huge change from the standard confident, action-oriented Legionnaire. Tellus was usually quiet, reserved, and unsure (at least in the beginning) of his actions.

For those of us who wanted to Legion to look less human and more alien, Tellus was a great addition. I remember when he and Quislet first joined the team and thought that this was exactly what a science fiction book should have. If the Green Lantern Corps could have members that didn't look like they were from Earth, so should the Legion.

When I think about what makes the Legion great, Tellus is one of the shining examples of everything I like about this book. He's a genuinely good-hearted character, with a strong desire to help. He came to Earth, putting himself in an incredibly harsh situation (I mean, would you want to live on a planet where, if you lost your face mask, you'd die?) and joined the Legion Academy. He also wanted to help those around him.

Like Blok, he was fascinated with the people around him and enjoyed watching how the rest of the Legion interacted with each other. He was kind of the new Blok, I guess, and his optimism was a refreshing change compared to a lot of the darkness going on around him. This was especially true as the conspiracy to kill the Time Trapper started up.

In fact, one scene during that conspiracy story really sums up Tellus - when he gets a flash of Saturn Girl's thoughts and realizes they're working together without the rest of the Legion, he's stunned. He can't believe that they're work against the team, or not include the rest in their plans. He's a Legionnaire through and through and anyone working against it in an anathema to him.

He did pop up in the 5YL Legion, but him trying to convince Projectra that the Dark Circle is good was, much like many other things during this run, a complete slap in the face regarding the character. The less said, the better.

Much like Blok, I'm really stunned that he never came back in either the PZH Legion or the Threeboot. Again, he's a visually stunning character (Steve Lightle did a great job on his design) and would be perfect both on the page and in animation. I can't be the only one who thinks a Tellus-stuffy would be a perfect Legion gift.

Thoughts? Did you like the Timber Wolf/Apparition story? What do you think of Tellus? Please share in the comments below or back on Reddit.

Until next week...