More Darkseid! More Legion histories! And the writers get tired or bored... we look at The Legion Secret Files 3003 & The Legion #27
The Legion Secret Files 3003
Before we get into the issue, I wanted to share some sales numbers:The Legion #26 - 26,589
The Legion Secret Files 3003 - 19,198
The Legion #27 - 25,622
Why did more than 7,000 fans decide not to buy Secret Files? Did they know something I don't?
Oh well, for the second week in a row, we have a big issue to go through, so let's get started... DC is really milking Legion fans for all they can get.
Your creator credits:
Dan Abnett and Andy Lanning (DnA) writing.
Leonard Kirk, Tony Harris, and Tom Feister on pencils.
Robin Riggs, Harris, and Feister on inks.
A boom tube opens and Orion, Barda, and Firestorm emerge. And fly... somewhere. Yep, that's the first two pages.
We join Trudy Trusoe, host of "The Earth Spins," which I'm guessing is a news show on... something... She's going to get a guided tour of Legion World so Shikari shows up to take her through a threshold. We get tons of background information on Shikari as she arrives. Trudy must have super powers as well because the threshold is floating above the ground, Shikari never touches her, and she's somehow able to get through it. Does everyone have flight rings? Wait, that's the next reboot.
We enter the Threshold Interface Chamber, where all the threshold doors are located on Legion World. We get background info on Legion Cadets, the Science Police, Titan Adepts, and Thresholds.
Oh, I see what's going on. We're not going to really connect to Foundations at all, except for the first couple of pages. This is, essentially, the issue that tells everyone who the characters are and what exists around the Legion.
So a waste of money for Legion fans and a really expensive Legion primer for someone trying out the series.
Trudy is greeted by Kid Quantum (who is potentially one of the most powerful Legionnaires), Saturn Girl (who won't enter someone else's mind... except all the times that she does), and Cosmic Boy (who gave up money to be a Legionnaire). Isn't Saturn Girl already the most powerful Legionnaire? I mean, she did shut down Universo almost single-handedly.
Then we get, again, a re-telling of the origin of the Legion. They screw it up immediately by referring to R.J. Brande as U.P. President, which he was not when the Legion was formed. They hand Trudy a Legion flight ring and we go to the command deck.
We're introduced to Gear, Chuck Taine (glad all the viewers of the show learn he's got a crush on Triad), Triad, and XS. Then to the Medical Center and meet Yoda, sorry Dr. Gym'll, Apparition, Ultra Boy (and we learn about their marital problems), and Cub Wazzo-Nah. I know that I'm slow on a lot of things here, but I never, ever thought they would stick with Cub for the kid's name. Just bad... and worse for Ultra Boy, knowing his son was named by Timber Wolf... and a baby wolf is a cub... just so bad...
Next, we see the Clubhouse, the bar and rec area. We've just tossed any idea of them being teenagers aside, haven't we? We meet Timber Wolf, Wildfire (he's just named Drake Burroughs, so they are completely ignoring his origin), Ferro, Star Boy, Dreamer, and Umbra (who doesn't get a bio... that's odd).
Trudy, Rokk, and Jazmin sit down for a drink (Saturn Girl has disappeared) when Kid Quantum suddenly looks worried and has to step out of the bar. When she gets into the hallway, she is surrounded by grey figures in fighting poses. She comments that time is rippling around her again (no idea how she made that leap of logic) and she worries that she'll need to step down as leader. She also won't tell Rokk what's going on. Glad to know that the concern is whether she can a good leader, not whether what's going on could be a bigger problem for the team.
We move next to the gym, where Superboy is sparring with Karate Kid... who I want to point out doesn't actually have any super powers and Superboy would destroy him, regardless of how much training he has, but I guess I should just relax with that and assume Val has super powers now. I mean, it's the only way this makes sense.
Superboy is also wearing a new costume that's absolutely nothing like what he put on in issue #26, so that makes no sense either. Trudy and Rokk have a nice chat about The Spirit of the Last Son, the "religion" that worships Superman, the Catastrophists, the people who want the world to end, and Superboy himself, who Rokk feels needs to learn a lot to not disappoint his "followers." Great job providing exposition over two Legionnaires fighting.
They try to get an interview with Sensor, but the Orandan refuses because she hates her appearance and wants her privacy. Glad to see Rokk treating her with more respect than, say, Chameleon.
Rokk tells Trudy that we have a few Legionnaires who are on a mission with R.J. Brande - M'onel, Chameleon, Kinetix, and Gates. I'm guessing the writers were a little tired by this point as they've given up trying to provide any background info on the characters. In Brainy's laboratory, we meet (of course) Brainiac 5, Spark, Violet (I guess they've thrown out Leviathan as her code name - did I miss that?... and considering, once again, she's drawn as a giant, I'd argue that she makes more sense as Leviathan than any other code name), and Invisible Kid.
Spark takes over the tour for no reason and shows Trudy Legion World. They fly through a few different habitats before they enter the Winath zone. As they fly above the trees, Trudy notices that there's a figure on the ground. Spark tells her that it's her twin brother, Garth... and they just fly away.
So to repeat, just to point out how dumb that was, a reporter is flying through Legion World, spots someone who looks like Element Lad, who she knows is dead, but is told it's Garth Ranzz, who she knows is dead, and just keeps on flying. No questions... nothing.
The only interesting part here is that Garth turns a tree into crystal. I guess he has Element Lad's powers.
Thankfully, both the tour and this issue are done.
But wait... the three from the beginning have arrived on Apokolips. Barda says, "Sire, the matter engines are processing at full capacity." And that everyone will learn the truth: "Darkseid is."
I'm fairly certain that if I had spent $5.95 on this, I woulda been pretty pissed. Nothing happened, we didn't learn anything new, it didn't move any story forward, and was basically just a introduction to the team for any new Legion reader... which means this book failed miserably because only Legion fans are buying this book.
Full disclosure - I actually wrote a whole couple of paragraphs about how silly it was that DC didn't mention Secret Files 3003 at the end of issue #26, as it was a big part of the storyline. Of course, after reading it, I realized that it wasn't part of the story, I didn't need to read it, and I don't know why they put it in the trade.
I was stunned that the writers just kinda gave up writing bios for the characters half way through the issue. The first half (focused on the characters the characters I'm guessing DnA likes) has bios, subplots, and interesting things for new readers. The second half (I'm guessing there's a reason some of them went off with Brande) got nothing. What was the point?
Art-wise, I was really confused and unimpressed by this. Leonard Kirk and Robin Riggs' section were good - straight-forward and they followed Chris Batista's style very well. That's not a surprise - both Kirk and Riggs are solid professionals who know how to make good comics.
But Harris and Feister's sections just looked... off. I'm going to try to explain why their parts didn't work for me and I'm still trying to wrap my head around it.
The female characters all looked at least 10-20 years older than the characters are supposed to be. Sensor, who Trudy describes as beautiful, looks horrific. The style is almost too cartoony and many times I thought I was looking at a bad animated version of the characters. In group shots, none of the characters were looking at each other so everyone seems disjointed and disconnected. And the art styles change so dramatically between panels that it really affects the flow of the book. Combine that with some horrible coloring and shading choices (done by Harris and Feister as well), and everything just looks bad.
What's crazy about this to me is that I think Harris is one of the greatest comic artists of his time and, if you showed me this after I read an issue of Starman, I'd never believe it's by the same person.
The Legion #27
Any old school MAD magazine fans here? Am I the only one who thinks this drawing of Superboy looks like it was done by Jack Davis?
We start in Kid Quantum's room, where she's just waking up. Gear has called saying there's trouble at the Time Institute (remember issue #26?). She rolls out of bed and is teleported to some snow-covered mountain range and, like in Secret Files 3003, she sees phantom images. She attacks, eyes closed, with her powers, and suddenly finds herself back on Legion World... and she's blasted a hole in the wall. Is that how her powers work now?
At the Time Institute, we pick up where we left off last issue (but not Secret Files) and Invisible Kid and Brainiac 5 are running from Hawkwoman and Orion.
The Continuity Police called and want me to ask one simple question - when does the Secret Files issue actually happen? It can't be between #26 and #27 for a variety of reasons - Brainy and Lyle being in two places, Orion being in two places, Superboy's costume being different, etc...
But they say it is, because Jazmin sees the images for the first time in Secret Files and now here... and doesn't look surprised in either case.
Was no one paying attention?
Back to the fight. Invisible Kid faces off against Hawkwoman and does surprisingly well, shifting between visible and invisible to cause no end to her confusion. Brainy uses his force field as an offensive weapon, punching Orion. Unfortunately, they're not able to defeat the Servants and a Boom Tube appears, which Lyle immediately identifies... although Brainy didn't know who Orion was... which leads me to wonder why they wouldn't have immediately done all the research they could on Apokolips, Darkseid, and his son as soon as they figured out who the villain was.
Lyle jumps through the Boom Tube to determine where the villains are going and Brainy has to deal with the bomb left behind.
The Legion arrives too late to help and see that the entire Institute has been destroyed. They can't get a signal from either Lyle's or Brainy's rings so they start lifting wreckage. Which is when Superboy arrives. And the Science Police just stop and stare.
A quick news recap lets us know that Brainy saved a bunch of employees under his force shield, the remaining time artifacts that weren't destroyed are headed to Legion World, Superboy freaked everyone out, and the people believing in The Spirit of the Last Son celebrated but ended up fighting with the Catastrophists.
And who does Cosmic Boy blame for that? Superboy, of course. I get this whole "Rokk's disappointed in the real Superboy" subplot, but this really feels like the last time Superboy showed up in the PZH Legion (and it was a different Superboy, right? So this actually makes no sense, right? And the Legion should be wondering who this guy is, right?). Superboy, instead of fitting in and helping out, ends up becoming a stooge who just looks bad throughout. Why are they doing this?
Elsewhere on Legion World, Brainy is scanning for any signal from Lyle while, at the same time, they're discussing the new temporal anomalies - which are from 10 years ago. They've also realized that the universe is shrinking - it's 27 percent smaller than before. Oh, and a new infant galaxy has just appeared on the edges on the Milky Way.
Is it weird that none of this seems that big anymore? I mean, with every story in The Legion being at such a massive scale, when they actually try to make it bigger, I just feel like it's another day at the office for these guys. I mean, Ra's Al Ghul jump-started evolution, Robotica destroyed the surface of Xanthu and invaded Earth, and Universo took complete control of two planets. What's the big deal with this?
Jazmin gets another flash of images, finally asks those around her if anyone saw them, but is, of course, ignored because they finally found Lyle's signal.
He's on an old stargate and the villains are using it to drain the Dark Matter out of the universe. Lyle's spotted by the alien Servant who has a mouth for a stomach (I think he's maybe the evil version of Martian Manhunter). Regardless, the alien can see Lyle even when he's invisible, which is never good. Just as Invisible Kid is about to get squashed... or eaten...
The Legion appears through a threshold, ready to fight. They lay into the few of them, but not before Orion's blasts break a few of Violet's ribs (I'm going to retire her Leviathan name). Much like every other fight with the Servants, a Boom Tube appears and they escape.
In a moment that I'm sure surprised (or confirmed) many reader's perceptions, Brainy kisses Lyle on the cheek, happy that he's safe. Thumbs up from me - anything to add depth and character to both of them. Wouldn't it have been a great story if Brainy admitted that staying in the closet is why he was such a grouch for all those years?
We also get a moment where Spark is holding an injured Violet, who's shrunk down, in her hand. Are they insinuating something else? I mean, it's a big reach considering Spark was just dealing with her feelings for Cham... and she and Violet have never been close in the PZH... but maybe they're just shipping as many characters as they can in order to make longtime fans happy.
Instead of shutting down the stargate, as Brainy figures that there would have to be thousands of stargates sucking Dark Matter and shutting down one would effectively do nothing, Shikari uses her powers to track where the Dark Matter is going. Why were there so many stargates? Brainy actually says "a hundred thousand stargates." Why would the U.P. have so many? Sorry, I just can't wrap my head around this.
To no surprise to anyone, they end up at that new infant galaxy they discovered before. Only it's not just a galaxy - it's also a massive Boom Tube.
What a surprise... DnA ended an issue on a cliffhanger. To be continued!
Just a minor quibble on the art - Mark Farmer didn't ink Chris Batista's pencils here (we got Chip Wallace and Andy Lanning). As a result, I think you can tell when we get different inkers, which results in a somewhat uneven-looking issue. Batista is, however, still bringing it every issue and even Lanning's heavy blacks can't ruin it.
Our next Legionnaire in the spotlight... Nightwind!!!
- Both first appeared in Amazing World of DC Comics #12
- Both were created by fans - Nightwind (actually, Nightwing in the beginning) was created by Robert Harris of Allentown, PA
- Both were renamed when they appeared in Legion comics after their creators. So Lara Londo (sister to Timber Wolf, I guess) became Berta Skye Haris
- Both were rejected for membership and later, at the urging of Wildfire, joined the Academy
- Both became Legionnaires during the Five Year Gap
But unlike Crystal Kid, Nightwind died while working for the U.P. Militia Academy when the Khunds invaded. I don't know if any new fans had a clue who she was or why they'd care, but it put a little more weight to the events. Or, if you're feeling cynical, it was a meaningless death that was par for the course during volume 4.
I've included pictures from after Keith Giffen redesigned her look and made her stand out from the rest with the long cloak and great eye makeup. Before that, she was a pretty generic hero and, if you look at her appearance in Legion #272, the only real difference between her and Lamprey (who we'll talk about next week) is the coloring. I've said it before, but Ditko was a shell of himself by the late 70's.
I honestly think that if Levitz hadn't been as interested in telling Academy stories as he was, Nightwind and her compatriots would've disappeared into the annals of Legion history, never to be seen again. In her limited appearances, she did have a small impact of the world of the Legion. And that's more than Robert Harris could've ever expected.
Thoughts? Did you like Secret Files 3003? Do you prefer Superboy in the Legion? Do you remember Nightwind? Until next week...
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