The Legion heads to New York City and Sun Boy and Harmonia save the day... let's look at Legion of Super-Heroes (volume 7) #7 & Legion Lost (volume 2) #7

Legion of Super-Heroes (vol 7) #7

I really have only one question about the cover. Since when did a Legionnaire wear their Flight Ring on their middle finger?

Anyway, welcome back after my week vacation. I have a vague memory of what happened in the issues I read before I left, so let's hope things make sense. If I remember correctly, we're in China and Dragonwing is facing off against Phoenix, who is her sister's criminal boss. Chameleon Boy is also there, as well as a dog.

Elsewhere in China, a huge part of the world has become a lava lake and, for reasons that make absolutely no sense to me, not only are people living right beside it while being protected behind force fields, the Earth isn't trying to fix it at all and is only using a catalytic converter to cut down on the pollution.

Also, just know that every time they mention "the Sea of Fire," I will be thinking of the epic scene in Flash Gordon when our heroes fly through the universe to the planet Mongo.

"Phoenix Rising" is written by Paul Levitz with art from Francis Portela. I'm in a better mood after my time off, so I won't be pointing my finger at a colorist who was only doing their job.

Phoenix has grabbed hold of Chameleon Boy, who has turned into a large monster, and is tossing him around. In true villain fashion, Phoenix talks to everyone and no one at the same time, and also in both first and third person, so that he can deliver the best monologue while beating up the Legion.

Dragonwing is immediately attacked by other followers of Phoenix (Phoenicians??) and shows how she earned her place in the Legion by spitting acid at them. It really looks like she's killing them, but what do I know?

No - in case you were worried she was breaking Legion code, she calls them "terracotta soldiers," so I'm hoping they're not humans. They look pretty living, but again, who knows?

We also learn that she got her powers by stealing "my fire from the Imperial Dragon's horde." As she faces off against her sister, Phoenix violently throws Cham to the ground, gloating about how easy this is.

Mon-El and Brainiac 5 are flying back from Panoptes, headed for Earth, and Mon-El agrees to call a fresh election so Brainy can be leader, as he wants. Wow, Mon, if you were so eager to stop being leader, why didn't you just resign when you won instead of using the Power Ring (everyone remember he used to be a Green Lantern?) so you could be in two places at once?

To the Dominator home world we go, where we learn that their chief scientist is cloning hybrids of Daxamites and Dominators to create a superior army that doesn't have a weakness to lead. I'm still not sure if I love Jabba the Hutt as the head of the Dominators, but this is a promising subplot.

At the Sea of Fire, Element Lad has realized that the problems and fireballs are not natural or because of an industrial accident. Someone is causing this destruction. Sun Boy volunteers to "sterilize the area," which means he's going to burn everything he can. So if this is the result of human interference, I guess we're, once again, not worried if they're still present, right?

Continuing the confusion over whether Legionnaires travel around Earth by Flight Ring or by cruiser, Harmonia (who's finally doing something other than stand around Brainy in the lab) and Comet Queen are heading to the Sea of Fire. Harmonia's not happy because the fires have been burning for so long. Comet Queen's happy for a couple of reasons - one, this might be the best she's been drawn in a while (kudos, Francis) and two, Harmonia has a new costume.

But before they even get out of Metropolis, Dream Girl interrupts and tells them to go to China to help Dragonwing and Cham. Comet Queen grabs Harmonia and they're off in a flash... which they should've been doing right from the beginning, right?

Speaking of Dragonwing, she's decided to attack Phoenix after getting over the shock of the villain knocking Cham out. She's dispatched in just over a page, but not before bragging that she never took any Tong protection. I'm honestly not too sure what the point of this story is, from Dragonwing's perspective. Are we elevating her and making her look better? Are we giving back story? Neither is working here, as there are more questions than answers and she just kinda looks weak half the time.

Phoenix knocks a wall onto her, knocking her out, but before he can kill her, the older sister (who they still haven't named yet this issue, but who cares about that, right?) says that since it's her sister, it's her blood.

Back at what once was the Sea of Fire, Chemical Kid is feeling pretty insignificant after watching Sun Boy burn everything to ashes and, essentially, solve the environmental problem. Dirk and Jan have caught the two saboteurs, who were muttering something about "Dragon Tongs" and "Phoenix." The two veteran Legionnaires talk about Earth's history, and the "us versus them" problems, while Chemical Kid looks pretty depressed.

Dirk goes off to meet some girl he met at Stonehenge's Sun Return Ceremony (anyone remember that from a few issues ago?) while the S.P.s show up to arrest the criminals.

Just as "big sister" is about the slice Dragonwing open, Comet Queen flies in and grabs her teammate. And runs head first into Phoenix. Ah... now I understand. This is the issue to elevate Harmonia.

She shows up and faces off against Phoenix, claiming that she "must admit distant kinship with" him. She throws a bunch of rocks at him and then encases him in stone. Did you know she was a natural elemental? I really need to start reading the identifying captions...

Anyway, Dragonwing puts her sister down and they're all placed into S.P. company. We get a final Academy moment where Chemical Kid, Comet Queen, and Dragonwing talk about how awesome Sun Boy and Harmonia are... and how they might not be good enough.

Then they ask Cham how he got beaten and he tells them that "all it takes is one careless nano." And that he got lucky today.

This one was really hit and miss for me. If Sun Boy could completely burn up one of Earth's biggest natural disasters, why didn't he do it years ago? If Harmonia is this powerful, why didn't she do any of this in volume 6? Would it be possible to get more of Dragonwing's back story? How is it possible for Element Lad to have lived on Earth this long, and lived through the whole Earth-Man saga, and not learned about the racist past?

But I actually liked the art for most of the book and the fight scenes really worked for me. I'm also getting used to "scared and hesitant" Chemical Kid - it's working far better than the "super arrogant" version. Less annoying, at least. And what we did get about Dragonwing kinda clicked... a bit... 

If nothing else, I've been enjoying this more than volume 6, so that's a good thing. 

 

Legion Lost (vol 2) #7

Did you know that Legion Lost is the second-longest DC run of Tom DeFalco's career? He also took over Superboy at the same time and lasted 2 more issues and an Annual.

But aside from that? Nine issues of Superman Family in the 70s.

DeFalco was a Marvel guy. He completed long runs on Amazing Spider-Man, Thor, Fantastic Four, and Spider-Girl. Much like previous Legion Lost writer Fabian Nicieza, he wrote popular runs and characters for DC's competition and was a name creator coming to work on DC's books.

If you're a fan of DeFalco's work, please skip the next paragraph or two...

But was there anyone reading comics who thought to themselves, "Wow! Tom DeFalco's taking over Legion Lost! This is going to be amazing!" Was he a draw?

To be blunt, I don't think any of his long runs on the books listed above, except for Spider-Girl, would be considered the best for those characters. He was a solid comic writer who knew his craft. But his name wasn't moving copies.

The conspiracy guy in me also wonders if he got all those long runs because he was also Editor-in-Chief and his friends were editing those titles... 

Okay, fans of DeFalco, you can come back now. I'll be nice from here on in. Maybe...

This issue, titled "When Katia Cries --!", is written by DeFalco with art by Pete Woods, who has so far been the only reason to keep laboring through this book. I'm moderately optimistic that DeFalco can tell decent stories. Right?

We begin with a dramatic first page. A girl, who looks a lot like Dawnstar, is strapped to a gurney, gagged, and some shadowy figure is about to give her an injection of something green. She doesn't know why they keep torturing her or what they want.

We move to New York City and the seven lost Legionnaires blip in due to Gates' teleportation powers carrying them all: Wildfire, Dawnstar, Timber Wolf, Tyroc, Tellus, and Chameleon Girl. They're immediately disgusted by the smells that greet them.

Gates has, and I shouldn't be surprised by this, completely changed his way of speaking: "I debated about droppin' ya in the middle of Times Square." Woods has also completely given up trying to draw him anything like how he looked in previous Legion comics and I'm assuming the reason the left side of his face is scarred and damaged is because of... the explosion first issue?

Tellus then uses his psychic powers to make every Legionnaire appear dressed in the same manner of fans of "the Kardashians" and I'm suddenly very sad that that horrific family is still a massive part of popular culture. In case you were wondering whether they were even trying to do the "strangers in a strange land" plot, Chameleon Girl's response to the cultural references is to comment, "No accounting for taste." So yes, Yera, a Durlan from the 31st Century, knows who Kim Kardashian is. And if she does, I feel the future is doomed.

Another random note - we've dropped the concept of each character narrating their own issue so the readers know who they are. So we're not going to get Gates or Yera telling us their thoughts for 22 pages... which I'm actually pretty disappointed by.

Tellus uses some mind control to get the team checked into a hotel room (and I'm not sure why he's not getting two rooms, but at least he got a suite this time). The team argues whether that's morally okay and Yera complains that they'd have to take on demeaning jobs to make money, referring to a fast food job. Okay, so the woman who's been pretending to be different kinds of aliens for the past... week??... has completely assimilated into Earth culture while murdering people for their Durlan DNA. Her powers are still not working properly, so she "melts" again and needs some help.

Tyroc then becomes "Exposition Lad" to let us know that they're still tracking Alastor (the guy who came to this time from the future and unleashed the biohazard that's turning people into aliens) and they believe he's in New York. They're now referring to him as an "eco-terrorist" so I guess the "maybe he's not so bad because he watched his sister die" plot point is gone.

Tellus feels the psychic scream from the woman on page one and we get another Legion argument about what they're supposed to be doing in this era. Tyroc wants to just alert the authorities while others want to go and save her. As Wildfire and Tyroc argue about who should be in charge, Dawnstar interrupts and lets them know that the Legion is all about protecting people. She turns for support and they realize Timber Wolf is already gone.

He's headed outside to grab Oz, a thief who saw them arrive a few pages earlier. I didn't mention him because, to be blunt, I figured there was no way we'd use him for this subplot... but, once again, I'm wrong. Oz tells them that, since they need help, he's just the person to get them money. Yes, they'd be stealing from a gang, but that's morally okay, right?

Tellus has entered the girl's mind and lets her know that the Legion is on its way. We find out her name is Katia (hence the title) and that she's far younger in her thoughts then in person.

The Legion preps for the rescue but are almost immediately called off by Dawnstar. Katia is not being held captive - she's in a hospital.

In Uptown, Oz has led Brin to the building where the drug dealers are storing their money. Instead of a plan, Timber Wolf jumps into action. Okay, they got his personality correct.

Dawnstar wants to help Katia - the medical facility is so primitive, especially compared to what they're used to, but Tyroc and Drake finally agree on something - it's time to move on and they can't waste their medikits.

Tellus is still in Katia's mind, both of them floating on rays (the sea creature, not the energy) and talking about how she ended up in the hospital. She was in a car accident and crashed when she looked at a text message. Two of her friends died and that's why she thinks she's being punished.

Oh, I should have mentioned that in this telepathic sequence, Tellus looks like a 300-pound, bald, muscle-bound giant. I guess that's less threatening than his usual appearance?

No surprise, Timber Wolf mows through the gang members, getting "a little exercise." It's the only action in this issue, so enjoy it!

Back in fantasy land, Tellus and Katia fly around, chat about how much better they're feeling, and ignore the fact that things are not looking so good in the real world. She asks Tellus to tell her his secret - what is he hiding?

Jumping back to the end of the fight, Brin has burned all the drugs and stuffed all the money into a duffle bag. Oz wants his cut but Brin wonders why a sidekick would get anything.

Back again, Katia is more concerned about Tellus than what's going to happen to her. She knows he's keeping a secret from his friends and he feels like he's betraying them. Tellus thanks her, telling her she may have saved the world.

Which is when Katia passes away. To no surprise, Tellus is really sad when he sees his teammates again and they want to know what's wrong. That's the big cliffhanger!

Oh, and apparently we're heading towards something called "The Culling," which is "a major crossover event that stars the Legion Lost, Teen Titans, and Superboy."

Wait, I've got to read more mediocre to bad comics to follow this story? Ugh...

Here is the nicest thing I can say about this story - I wish it had taken up two issues. Everything went too fast. Tellus bonding with Katia happened in a heartbeat and made no sense. Timber Wolf needed more moments with Oz for that to make sense. Most of the book was everyone just standing around and, if you gave those two stories a chance to breathe, you could've done more with the rest of the team.

Also, we're seven issues in and they still haven't even mentioned the fact that Yera is married and away from her husband. I get that they thought she was dead for a while, but you'd think it would be on her mind. Or something would ask how she's feeling about being away from Gim. Geez, the man never gets any respect, does he?

I know I've said this before, and I'm getting the sense this is how I'm going to be talking about this series for the entire run, but at least Pete Woods' artwork looked great. This was kind of a nothing story that really only exists to introduce this new subplot. If only someone writing Legion comics could explain that you can write the A plot, the B plot, and the C plot in the same issue and let all of them develop...

Speaking of great writers, the Long Live the Legion podcast is, once again, joined by Alex Segura. This episode we're talking about Volume 3 of the Legion and praising what at least one of us considers the better than The Great Darkness Saga. Check it out wherever you get your podcasts or on YouTube!